Are you looking at making life changes but are sitting on the fence trying to decide which way to jump? Sometimes the old is comfortable, like an old shoe; but old shoes wear out, get holes and become…well, garbage if you keep them long enough. And sometimes our lives feel sooo comfortable. We don’t want to change. We worry about the future and about what might happen if we step out and try something new. But guess what? Worry is really just praying for stuff you don’t want. If you believe in the law of attraction, that which you put out there…you receive, so if you’re worrying about bad stuff happening, don’t be so surprised when it DOES happen.
So what if you have that dream, but you’re on the fence of giving it a test drive? What if you would have to move or quit your job? So what? If you’ve been on that fence a while, maybe it’s time to ask yourself a few questions. Let’s start with these. How big is that dream? How much do you want it? Is it worth it to try? And if you DON’T go for it, will you always be sorry? Will you get bitter as the years go on for not going down a path, or getting off that fence of indecision? Whether you’re 20 years old or 40, 10 years from now, if you’re still alive, you’ll be 10 years older. So where will you be? Still on the fence? Or will you have given up and wish you hadn’t?
The next set of questions are what if you DO go for it? Will you be sorry if you fail? Or maybe just glad you gave it a try? What if you succeed? What if it’s the best decision you could have made?
So what if something new is scary? All new things have a bit of adventure, some curiosity, maybe a teaspoon of imagination and at least a dash of fear. Have you seen what some people have achieved because they’ve taken that step and gotten off their fence?
There are so many things you can do if you would only take action! You will never know unless you take that step.
Do you want friends that will always be there for you? Are you looking for the love of your life, but can’t seem to find him or her? Are your neighbors simply horrible?
Instead of looking outward, what if we look inward? What if we took control and became what we’re looking for? If you want someone who will be there for you through thick and thin; not judge you or complain about you, at least not very much; be respectful, honest and faithful…or whatever you’re looking for, what if you became that person? Mirror who you want to be.
Have you looked at who you are? What if you decided to become more loving, less judgmental, more honest and faithful if that’s what you want from someone else? Do you know that you will attract those types of people to you? The more you love yourself at a soul level and not a superficial one, the more you’ll attract loving people to you. The more honest you are, the more people who lie will decide you aren’t for them. And the happier and more joyful you are at a deep level, the less the angry, spiteful people will be comfortable in your orbit. Your vibration will simply be too high.
Instead of lamenting what you don’t have, or judging those around you who don’t meet your expectations for your friends, your loved ones, or even your neighbors or the people you work with, what if you tried appreciating them more? Staying in a place rooted in love and peace? Some people will run screaming from the room, but many people will come up and meet or exceed your expectations if you stop ripping them up or tearing them down.
But you say, that’s a lot of work! What if it doesn’t work???
When you carry on a conversation with someone are you fully present? If you are with someone who is distracted constantly, don’t you get a little annoyed? Nowadays people check their phones; they look around; they don’t meet your eyes…and sometimes even when they are looking at you, they don’ seem to really be in the conversation. And if you’re on a date they may be checking out other people or even flirting with them while they are with you. Argghh! Or they may be off in their own world thinking about a grocery list, how difficult their day has been, planning world peace…who the heck knows what people are thinking about?? What do you do when this happens? Do you just get annoyed? Do you say something?
On the flip side, have you ever been with someone who is fully present with you? You know if you have. It’s like a gift. The person is engaged, keeps up with the conversation moving it along, leaning in…and if their phone rings or makes noise they either reach down and turn it off without looking or apologize and pull it out to silence it without actually checking it. You feel like the most important person in their world and your self-confidence may be at an all-time high. And aren’t you super happy to be in their presence and value them as a friend?
Now, take a look at how you interact with someone. Are you more the first example or the second? Imagine how your spouse, your children, your boss and all your friends would feel if you acted more fully present for them. Are you willing to try it?
It only takes practice to pay attention like that. Try a little at a time. Don’t answer your phone unless you know something important is coming up, and then warn the person you’re with that you’re waiting for a call or a text. Don’t let your mind wander far from the conversation in one direction or another. If you are simply curious about what the person is saying and try to ask questions to get more involved, it isn’t so very hard at all. Your friends and loved ones will feel SO good in your presence and value you all the more. In other words, the rewards…priceless!
How do you stay calm when the world seems to be going crazy around you? Or do you? When politics, riots, COVID, the lock down or anything else happens out in the world, how do you react? Do you feel safe and calm in your little protected bubble; are you worried sick; are you angry; or maybe you swing wildly back and forth?
If the world is driving you crazy and you don’t like who you are nowadays, take a deep breath. Just know, it’s probably fear of some sort. Fear of not knowing what the outcome for any of these situations will be and how it will impact you. What if the political party you don’t like takes office or the shut down due to COVID lasts for years, how will it hit the stock market, your job, the housing market, etc., etc.? We simply don’t know. Not knowing leads to stress, fear, anxiety, depression, anger…you name it, depending on the person.
So, how do you stay calm? Many people swear by meditation. Meditation causes your brain to slow down, to be more relaxed and generally lift your vibration higher above the fears, irrational and otherwise. But anything that relaxes and calms you will work. Some people knit, some garden and some just count to 10 to relax and stay calm. Some unplug from the news and any type of social media. Others unfriend people who get nuts and rant on and on. Finding your happy place will really help you release the fear, and stepping away from the people that trigger you if at all possible is a very good idea.
So how do you stay calm? One breath at a time. Outer circumstances don’t have to influence your inner world and the way you react. The good thing is, it’s your choice.
When your religion says you have to love everybody, just how do you do that? Do you force yourself to hang out with people that you really don’t like, frustrate you, drive you crazy or just irritate the heck out of you? Do you pretend to love them?
Loving people we really don’t like can be tough if we do it from our personalities. They may seem mean, rude or obnoxious, or maybe even dangerous. From our human perspective, some people may just not be loveable. Even if we try to love them from afar, we may be kidding ourselves. So what the heck do we do if we want to give this loving thing a shot?
I find that if I can meditate or raise my vibration in some way, I raise my consciousness higher. When I feel at least a little disconnected from my regular human emotions and feel more peace or love, it is soooo much easier to then think from a higher consciousness where judgment seems to fall away. From there I can much more easily send loving thoughts to someone or wrap them in a love bubble. If you ask for their highest and best to happen, including any lessons that they need to learn, it actually ends up being fairly easy to send them the love from that standpoint. Give it a shot. You don’t have to spend more time with the difficult person, but you may be surprised that you feel calmer, safer or more loving towards them during your day to day life if you run into them. And they may act differently too.
When opportunities come your way do you embrace them? Do you take a long time trying to figure out if you should say yes or no, or maybe you run screaming into the night? When you are faced with a decision with a completely unknown outcome do you – say yes to a date, to a job, to an opportunity to travel…what do you do? I know I’ve done a variety of things. Jumped in and grabbed the opportunity even if fear of the unknown hit me, delayed making up my mind until the opportunity vanished, and I’ve even said no out of fear. What do you usually do?
So many times we don’t even see an opportunity when it bites us in the butt. We may be going along our merry way even asking for change, but we don’t see it when it shows up. Why is that?
I think we are so busy with life, wrapped up with what IS that we don’t see what could be. Even when we ask for something different in our life, we may not hear what someone says that would spark that growth; an idea doesn’t take root because we aren’t paying attention.
So how do you see those opportunities clearly? Set an intention that you will be more in the now and start paying attention to everything people say and what happens around you. Try not to get so wrapped up with what you’re doing that you become oblivious and ignore opportunities when they appear. Opportunities are everywhere to help you grow and be all that you can be, if you choose to let it be so.
Are you so busy rushing through your life you don’t see the gifts along the way? Those little things that can really make your life worth living? Maybe someone compliments you, your spouse makes you coffee in the morning, your child hugs you, or you find a five dollar bill in the pocket of an unused jacket. Sometimes the little things can be overlooked, but they can really light up our lives and make them more fun.
If we stay open and pay attention, we’ll notice those little things. We’ll appreciate them and the person that initiates them; we’ll feel loved and get all sorts of warm fuzzy feelings. BUT, we need to slow down a bit before any of this can happen. A car going at 80 mph can’t see the bunny hopping towards the street or the small sign that signals a fresh fruit stand, so we don’t even know what we’re missing. If we can find a way to take life just a little slower, it will be a little less stressful and we won’t miss some of those amazing things life has to offer.
So the next time something happens that feels like a gift, screech those tires and slow down your life long enough to enjoy that bunny or the fresh fruit from the stand. Smell those roses. You will be happier, more at peace and feel more loved. I guarantee that you and everyone in your life will be glad you did.
When things go wrong do you ever think of one of those old fairy tales and ask yourself, “Where is my fairy godmother?” I mean, why can’t someone just show up out of the blue and help make my wishes and dreams come true?
Just like the man who asked God to help him and then kept ignoring the help from another human when it was offered, sometimes when we ask for help or guidance it comes in a form we don’t expect and don’t always notice. What if you asked for guidance on a matter and instead of getting a thunderbolt out of the blue or an angel appearing, you heard something pop out at you from a commercial on TV? Or maybe your boss or someone else says something off hand that is the total answer to your prayer or wish?
I remember seeing a movie in a theatre I found kind of stupid and really wished I could have walked out of, but towards the end one line from one of the characters made me cry because I realized that was the answer I had asked for.
Or maybe someone will say something out of the blue and it will answer your questions. I remember trying to decide where to move when I was younger. I and my best friend were trying to decide between Colorado, Washington and Texas after discarding the other 47 States as options. We decided to hold off and come back a week later. When we spoke again we had both made up our minds. Thank goodness it was the same State! We chose Colorado because both of us had 3 separate confirmations. So 6 times in the course of the week, we had someone we knew or in some cases strangers, speak to us about Colorado and what a great state it was. We hadn’t told any of these people of our intended move or of the circumstances regarding our decisions. Totally out of blue.
So the next time you need an answer and wonder why you aren’t either having someone fix the problem for you or give you the answer you prayed or asked for…maybe you’re wrong. Maybe you have gotten the answer you wanted, but you just weren’t paying attention or realizing that the source can be from anywhere. So pray if you like and ask for guidance if you want, but pay attention. Your answer truly can come from any and every direction.
Do you ever wonder if your life is on track? If you are where you’re supposed to be, doing what you’re supposed to be doing? You aren’t alone. So many of my clients say this.
Even if you’re one of the lucky ones and feel like you’re living your purpose, when something goes “wrong”, you may start questioning yourself. Did I go right when I should have turned left? Did I say yes when I should have said no? Maybe I didn’t take that opportunity I was given…sound familiar?
Or if you’re someone whose life pretty much seems like it’s totally off track, this could be a great thing! If you feel the wake-up call, you can do something about it! Awareness really is the first and biggest step, and actually sometimes is the only thing you have to be aware of to change your life.
Whether you feel on track or off, when things start feeling wrong or just off somehow, you may have taken a bit of a detour on your life path. Detours aren’t necessarily bad things. My dad used to call detours the “scenic route”. All roads lead to where you want to go, if you know what you want. Some may take a little longer and have some detours along the way; but the scenic route can sometimes actually be more enjoyable. You don’t always have to travel on a straight line to get where you feel you need to be. If you can find a way to enjoy your journey, you are already on your path. Then you don’t have to worry if you are on track.
When life slams into you and you want to yell OW! What do you do after that? Do you continue to yell OW, OW, OW, OW, OW!!!!!!!!! For 5 minutes, 5 hours, 5 days or even 5 years? Do you go over and over the hurt until it turns into resentment? Maybe even living in the past so that your present is pushed aside? If the pain and hurt is from a love relationship, doe it infect or impact the next one, and the one after that?
Sometimes as human beings we need some time to keep yelling OW! I’m hurt; I’m in pain! We need to know it’s okay to feel that way. But at some point, we need to take that step forward and release that past hurt. Just like falling and skinning your knee, the scab has to come, usually followed by the itching and the healing. If you keep picking at the hurt, it will never heal. If you won’t let go of the past through forgiving others or yourself, or both, you may never get through or over the problem. That skinned knee will never heal.
So question for you. Do you want to keep reliving that painful time? If you do, that’s your choice. But when you’re ready to stop yelling OW and pointing the finger at whatever or whomever you feel hurt you, then and only then will you be able to move forward, find your path again and take your power back.