Do you ever feel lonely? Where are you when that happens? And how often does that happen?

Being alone and feeling lonely can be two totally separate things.

If you are generally okay when you’re alone and don’t feel lonely very often, it pretty much means you enjoy your own company, that you aren’t scared to be alone, and that is indeed a very healthy thing.

I know a couple of people who either dated people who were horrible for them or who married someone just because the alternative of being alone was so awful for them. Let’s just say they are not happy with the person or persons they chose but they would rather have a not so wonderful life than leave if they have to be alone.

Some people feel lonely in their relationships and even in a crowd or at a party.

Where are you in this spectrum?

Step 1 to not being lonely is to find a way to like yourself more. If you can enjoy being in your own company, you won’t feel so alone. What will that take for you?  Take a good look at yourself. What is it that makes you feel lonely? Some people need to respect themselves more, or find a way to be more interesting. Others need to simply find a group that makes them feel listened to or turn inward to meditation. And others really need to work out deep seated issues that they can’t do alone.

No matter what someone tries to suggest to you, only you know what you’ll need for this step. If you aren’t sure, try different things. The lighter and more fun you can be while you are going through this, the easier it will be.